Today I had a conversation with one of my friend where we talked about travelling to another continent and she admired how brave I was as I have been travelling a lot nowadays. She expressed she was afraid of flying therefore it was harder for her to go somewhere far outside Europe.
I think many of us are in the same situation where we don’t do something just because we are afraid of it. Some don’t apply for a scholarship to study abroad, some don’t dare to travel alone, some don’t dare to write a blog, make a video… etc, all because we are afraid of the consequence. “What if I don’t succeed?” “What if people laugh at me?” “What would others think of me?”
I used to be scared as well. For many years I didn’t dare to apply for any scholarship as I was afraid I would fail so I kept missing the chance to study abroad. I didn’t dare to stand up and talk in front of many people. However, one day it changed.
I accidentally found an article on the Internet about the TOP 5 things people regret before they die (you can read more here).
It reminds me that one day I will die. And the truth is all of us will die. Everyone in this world is born and die without choice. We don’t choose to be born and to die. However, the time between is our choice. We can choose to live our life in rat race or the way we want.
After reading the article I imagined myself lying on the bed and wondered what I would think 5 minutes before my death. That I will be like them and regret for not doing what I want or that I have a wonderful life?
Of course I want to feel that I have lived and be proud of myself for taking all the chance I can. Since then I decide to go for whatever I want and I’m ready to take time, energy and courage to make them happen. In my last year of university I applied for every speech contest, student conference, youth forum that was interesting for me. I didn’t care about what others would think about me or about how I would perform. I wanted to give myself chance and go for it. If I succeed it, it was nice, but if not I knew I had done everything so there was no regret. The same with travelling. To some of the programs, such as world youth forums, work and travel programs, there is age limit. Usually until the age of 30. Now I am 23 years old, which means I have 7 years more to participate in these programs. So whichever program interest me I apply for it.
Going back to the fear, I am also afraid of a lot of thing. Travelling alone, standing in front of many people. But if that is my goal to achieve then I will go for it without thinking too much of the consequence. Because that is the only way I don’t have to regret anything when I lie on my death bed.
As for a method, firstly, I ask myself: “What could possibly happen if I do this?” Usually the answer makes me realize I have nothing to lose, so I just go for it.
SecondIy, I have bucket list where I list all the things I want to achieve in this lifetime. So it reminds me what is more to accomplish. I have a reverse bucket list as well, where I list all the things that I have already done. And that one give me a sense of success, and motivate me to keep going for my dreams and goals.
Answering the question in the title, if fear hinders you in doing what you want, I suggest you to write your own bucket list. Have a normal and a reverse one on a piece of paper. Keep them with yourself. So whenever you feel down or lost you can read them to find a courage and motivation. A normal bucket list is for you to keep on going and the reverse bucket list is to encourage you that you can do it.
Remember that all of us has fear, and it’s normal. So the brave person is not someone who are not scared, but the one who dare to face and overcome the fear.